The Diamond

By Ally Karsyn, columnist

On April 29, while Will and Kate celebrate their royal wedding, I’ll be celebrating a wedding too—of my best and only girlfriend from my high school days.

Her wedding is something of a milestone for me, marking the glaringly obvious mistakes of my dating past. 

Three year ago, the groom-to-be and I were sitting in my car, attempting to have the “Defining the Relationship” talk for the fourth or fifth time. It took me seven months to get out of this vague relationship.

I cut ties with him right before I came to college.

Fast-forward a few years, and now I’m a bridesmaid in his wedding.

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By Adrian Hielema, columnist

For the unlucky few who have read my columns in the past, you will have noticed that they tend to focus on the specific part of the world in which I am living. When I was in the Middle East, that was no problem; the land was full of excitement, adventure, passion, and intrigue. Now I’m in Canada. Which, let’s face it, has none of those things.

Don’t get me wrong, I like Canada. Actually, that’s a bit of an understatement. I love Canada. If Canada were a person, I’d friend request it on Facebook, find its favorite movies, and then casually insert quotes from them into conversation with Canada so it would have no choice but to fall for me.

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By Jaleesa Dyk, columnist

Saturday afternoon channel surfing frightens me. Everything from cheesy Lifetime movies to Fit TV belly dancing and everything in between flashes across the screen in minutes. Normally, as a true child of generation Y2K, I flip through black and white shows as quickly as possible, but the other day was different.

There he was, a blast from the past, the kid that could make my gramps laugh till he cried, the “Beav” himself.  I watched for about 5 minutes as Mrs. Cleaver settled a dispute between her sons.

As commercials came across the screen, I flipped the channel.  “Oh my Gawddd!” shrieked from the speakers as onlookers giggled. The infamous Snooki was screaming into her telephone, attempting to defend herself and her, err, hobbies…

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By Kenny Gradert, columnist

So I’m typing my last article of the year—my last article in the Diamond forever—and I’m a little late in submitting it to our fine editors for review.

Fine, three days overdue is worse than “a little late.”

This is an anomaly, I swear. Grant me some mercy, please, for I’ve been busy. Instead of exams, I’ve been chugging out 6-8 pg. term papers. Four are done, one more to g—

—before I finished typing, an email from a professor landed in my inbox—apparently I forgot about an essay. Not even kidding. Two more to go.

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By Ally Karsyn, columnist

During an interview on the Colbert Report, Jody Williams and Stephen Colbert debated women’s rights and equality before getting into a classic battle of the sexes argument.

Williams, who won the Nobel Peace Prize in 1997, co-founded the Nobel Women’s Initiative and was talking about its goal to promote peace with justice and equality when Colbert said, “Don’t women have equality now? We went through the ‘60s, went through the ‘70s. We had Ms. magazine. It’s done.”

Williams didn’t agree. She still sees women being kept down.

Colbert let her talk and he even said women should be equal before accusing her of thinking women are better than men.

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By Adrian Hielema, columnist

There’s a rather large elephant in the room. I’ve been in Israel for almost two months, I can see the West Bank dividing wall from my bedroom, but until this day I have not bequeathed upon the readers of the Dordt Diamond my expert opinion on the Israel-Palestine conflict. So here in the space of one Diamond column, I am going to solve all the problems of the region.

We can unite the Israelis and Palestinians through the musical talents of Rebecca Black. Or maybe give them a common enemy. 

I jest, the conflict is way too complicated to be solved by any witty pop culture references. Heck, the conflict is too complicated to be solved, period. It’s a sobering thought, that there might be problems in our world that will never have solutions. So instead of preaching on who’s right or who’s wrong, I thought I might say a little about two people I met on either side of an issue that’s as confusing as the sudden rise to fame of Rebecca Bl-wow, I’m really sinking this low, aren’t I?

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By Jaleesa Dyk, columnist

Living within a college community has its fair share of advantages and disadvantages. On the plus side, college students always have people to talk to and always things to do. 

Beyond a social life, campus residents are constantly privy to classes, professors, student activities, and a host of other opportunities. 

Despite the obvious benefits of campus life, one major disadvantage arises: to live on a college campus is to live in a secluded world. We’re so swamped with papers, tests, sports, meetings, and social lives that our biggest worry at the end of the day is how to manage the next.

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By Kenny Gradert, columnist

Throughout this current academic year, most of my articles have focused on relatively minor and local topics: the disappearance of the Humble Bean, the lack of rock bands and pranks on campus, and alcoholic smoothies.

But with the international news that’s been infiltrating my Google Reader as of late, it now seems a waste of words to chit-chat about campus life.

Not long ago, a man in Tunisia set himself on fire (literally) and seemed to spark a chain reaction of middle-eastern revolutions. After Tunisia came Egypt. Our very own Adrian Hielema smelled the tear gas. 

The latest news, of course, is Libya. 

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By Ally Karsyn, columnist

A few weeks ago, Giles Coren, a British food critic and novelist, wrote an article for the UK’s Daily Mail, posing the question why it’s okay for women to be sexist about men on TV in light of two male reporters for Sky Sports getting sacked for sexist remarks made about women.

This is from the same man who wrote an article two years ago called “Potty-mouthed and proud.” If you want the quick answer as to why women feel the need to express “sexist” statements about men, it’s because of guys like Giles Coren.

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Jumping Jews and Jerusalem Jokes

By Adrian Hielema, columnist

Guns N’ Moses. I can’t help but let out a chuckle looking at the T-shirt hanging in front of me. I’m in the old city of Jerusalem, which lies between the Mount of Olives, the City of David, and other places you half-paid attention to in Sunday School. The other T-shirts hanging in the storefront all seem to revolve around puns on the word Jew, there’s a “Just Jew It,” “Jew-Unit,” and a “Jew talking to me?” shirt with a picture of the very non-Jewish Robert De Niro plastered on it.

There’s something about being conquered no less than 37 times throughout history that gives Jerusalem a very unique sense of humor. From T-shirts to bus drivers to store owners, a joke and a smile can always be expected. I leave the T-shirt store and head down towards the Western Wall, the last remnant of Jerusalem’s second temple and the holiest site in all of Judaism. Myself being a potential customer, store owners call out whatever they must to get my attention. “Buy a very nice scarf here, for a loved one!” I keep walking. “For your girlfriend!” Almost out of hearing range. “For your boyfriend?” 

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